8. You meet the perfect person. Romantically, this person is ideal: You find them physically attractive, intellectually stimulating, consistently funny, and deeply compassionate. However, they have one quirk: This individual is obsessed with Jim Henson's gothic puppet fantasy The Dark Crystal. Beyond watching it on DVD at least once a month, he/she peppers casual conversation with Dark Crystal references, uses Dark Crystal analogies to explain everyday events, and occasionally likes to talk intensely about the film's "deeper philosophy."
Would this be enough to stop you from marrying this individual?
8. Why did you have to make it a puppet fantasy...those are the only things I have nightmares about. If they are anything like those damn dirty muppets from Labyrinth then this makes the decision very difficult for me. I'm not going to google it or something in fear that they will be. Its 4 am here and I don't want to go to sleep with those in my head. Anyway, yeah this would probably kill me. Especially if she kept posters or something in the bedroom. Nothing screams flaccid like a dirty muppet watching me do my thing. And she'd make me watch it too I know it. Maybe if I saw the movie I'd change my mind, but I mean she could be a terrible decorator and terrible at cleaning around the house and lazy, which is equally important to me finding her attractive, so I mean if she was lazy as well as a dark crystal fanatic, then its really no contest. I won't go so far to say I'd rather die alone, but I'd find another woman.
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